for rekha

library.jpeg

drawn together,
instinctively.
fumbling like blind mice,
in the scrabble, our searching fingers touched.
small pink hands grappling, gripping
onto each other,
so we would not face
the dark tunnels alone.

as we grew, our eyes stretched
and our minds expanded.
the murky tunnels began to feel like home,
each dent and contour
homespun to our fragile paws.
you and me,
me and you,
hand and hand,
we made it through.

but then,
you disappeared.
my footsteps solitary down stretches of dark,
echoing down the walls
like a witches’ spell.
glimpses of you flickered,
streaks of light whipping past my face
in the gloom,
igniting the room
for just one moment.

lungs filled with a breath of hope,
i surged on, waiting,
heart vibrating.
my passage progressed alone,
clothed in self-pity
and ignorant to the waves of pain rushing through you,
ignorant to the waking nights and
neon lights,
blind to the prodding and prying,
blind to the bleeding,
and blind to the crying.

and in my ignorance,
other noises filled your silence.
other swellings made me stumble,
the paths felt foreign
and distant
again
to my searching feet.
other songs replaced your quietude.

you, who has gone,
you, who has suffered,
you, who was dying
and it is i who
wallows in self-sorrow.
you are gone,
but still these walls pulse with your presence
still these books oscillate your memory
and i will never
forget you.

[this poem is written in memory of my good friend rekha, who passed away recently. she was a kind, loyal friend and we spent many happy moments together. i am grateful that i knew her.]

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9 thoughts on “for rekha

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